HOW TO STOP CARING WHAT OTHERS THINK
Why are we so afraid of what everyone will think? So much so that we let it hold us back from identifying and pursuing what we want to do with our lives? The answer is pretty simple, and we can thank our left over cave person brain for that one. Being ostracized from the tribe = death way back when. If you were alone, there was a good chance you wouldn’t survive. Safety in numbers and all that.
This thought pattern still exists deep down in our subconscious, so it’s only natural that we want everyone to like us. It means we are safe. But, not doing the thing and pushing your life forward because you’re worried about what Auntie Sandra will think, isn’t protecting anyone.
So the question is, how do we stop the fear of what others think from holding us back in pursuing our dreams, our life purpose?
ACCEPT THAT THEY DON’T ACTUALLY CARE
Yup. Trust me - everyone is so busy wondering (and worrying) about how they come across, that they don’t care what you are doing. Tough pill to swallow I know, but for the most part they really don’t give a rats. If you come across someone who does, it says way more about them than you. We all project our thoughts and feelings onto everyone else, so the if you think they will judge you just remember - they are really judging themselves.
ACCEPT THAT NOT EVERYONE WILL LIKE YOU
Let me just say this - do you like every single person you’ve ever encountered? Didn’t think so. Not everyone will like you, and that’s ok. Really, it is. Let’s say you’re at a social event, and you meet three new people. You are all new to each other, and all sit and have the same conversation with each other. Every single one of them will go home with a different opinion of you, despite having the exact same experience with you.
Why? Because of their values, beliefs and stories they carry. One may love you because you share the same opinions on various issues, or you remind them of someone they already know and love. One may not like you because they didn’t like your outfit, or you remind them of someone else they don’t like. It doesn’t actually matter what you do - there will always be someone who doesn’t like you. So you may as well be who you are.
STOP MAKING ASSUMPTIONS
You just know that so and so will judge you and think you’re a failure, right? That you are mental for following the path that feels true and authentic to you? Oh how they will laugh.
Maybe, but maybe not. You do not know what other people are thinking. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve made those very assumptions, only to be completely surprised by that person’s reaction being the polar opposite. How do you know what they are thinking? Can you say with absolute certainty that that is what they are thinking? Nope. So stop trying.
START WORKING ON THAT CONFIDENCE
When you really believe in yourself, you stop giving so much of a shit what everyone else thinks. Building your confidence can be a challenge for sure, but little by little it is possible. Start with that inner critic - she’s a culprit! Just because you believe something to be true, doesn’t mean it is. When you catch those negative thoughts, write them down and switch them around. ‘I’m too old to even consider changing my path’ becomes ‘I am exactly where I need to be, right now. I have all the time I need’.
If you need an extra push, hop over here to Bewitch Your Energy. It’s free, and has some super helpful ways to help you stop caring what other people think of you. Plus, you’ll get some energy back to boot!
